Shhh… let me share a secret with you. No one knows I’m doing this running lark apart from you dear reader. Well you, Aimee, my husband and two friends.
I’ve been training for weeks now and haven’t told anyone. Like Batman, #jigglingjugs is my alter ego which unfortunately makes poor Aimee my Alfred. Not only does she have to devise all my training plans, she also has to listen to my ramblings and endless questions at all times of night and day.
I’ve been wondering why I’ve kept this such a secret? I mean, it’s really not a big deal. I have several friends who have just started running and happily post photos of themselves at Park Run on Facebook. Why do I find it so hard to tell anyone?
I think the main reason is fear of failure. If this running lark comes to a sudden end, no one will be any the wiser. Tried it, didn’t manage it, move on. Ask me no questions, I’ll tell you no lies about how I almost cracked the half marathon.
And the other reason is I’m worried people will suddenly think I’m super fit. I haven’t lost any weight running so I don’t look any different. If I tell anyone, I’m sure they’ll look me up and down and think “yeah right love, running to eat more pies”.
The day I tell someone that I run is the day I’ll have to jog across a road, trip up and be hit by a bus. As I’m carted off to A&E that person will be shaking their head saying to the paramedics “Poor thing, she reckoned she was a runner but it was all pretend.”
But, as in any good comic, my secret is about to be exposed. A friend has signed me up for bloody Park Run. My name will be on the list and no doubt there will be Facebook photos.
If you see someone running in a Batman mask, that’ll be me…